Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Are the End Times Near?

I’m not a religious person, nor have I ever read the bible, but lately I noticed some things I find very disturbing…could they be signs of the imminent apocalypse? (I’m only kidding, of course.)

Sign #1 – Forever Lazy

Have you seen this new product? Its name says it all…a clear sign that the human race is going in the wrong direction. Are we really so lazy that simple tasks like operating a thermostat (or blanket) or pulling down your pants to use the restroom are too complicated? Are there really people out there that are thinking, “Oh man, I wish I didn’t have to work so hard to keep myself covered with this blanket”?

If we can’t be bothered with using a blanket, can being too lazy to eat be far off? At the very less, if this product catches on, birth rates will plummet…nothing says, “Let’s get it on,” like a brightly colored, oversized, fleece onesie.  My favorite scene in this ridiculous infomercial is the couple sharing a romantic moment on the deck…I’m pretty sure that date isn’t ending in the bedroom.

Sign #2 – Pajama Jeans (and the wearing of regular pajamas in public)

Again, are we really that lazy? I just have two things to say about pajama jeans (and the general trend to wear pajama pants in public):
  1. If I managed to put on pants this morning, so can you, and
  2. If your jeans are really that uncomfortable and hard to put on, try buying the next size up.

Sign #3 – The existence of these:

Enough said.

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